hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize