Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
