Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
