She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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