Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
