The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
