the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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