You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Randomize
