Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
