You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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