He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
