I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Too much gin, very little bucket
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
