before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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