I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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