He disabled his match.com account in front of me
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
