apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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