Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
