i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
