We're like a lot better than the average bears
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
