I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
