Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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