Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I have already put on my inside pants.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
