I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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