his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
