What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
