I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
