I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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