bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
