in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
