i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
