Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
