i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
