At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
