ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
