Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
