so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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