Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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