My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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