He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
