Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
