fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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