Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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