Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
