By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
