He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
