But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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