In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
