i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
