I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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