Your dad touched me again.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
